#i thought his juvie time was more recent. But no. Hes 17 in the show. He was 14 when he went to juvie for 3 months. What the fuck

[gothamcityneedsme]

god im still thinking about how everyone goes on about how terry ''has a record" and like. HE WAS 14!!!! GOD!!

[spookyvalentine]

1 4 5 7 13 17 25 33 48 57 85 for mercy!

1. What is their gender?

mercy is nonbinary--specifically, agender! they are a genderless ungendered 6’ 2” void of gender. 

the shelter that took mercy in as a baby--and the fosters they’d been bounced around in as a child--never referred to mercy as anything other than they/them, maybe from some sort of ‘let the kid self-determine’ thing that’s way more common in the future (and, also, it’s a little easier for the adults to be impersonal? There’s just. A lot of kids)

4. Do they have any siblings? How many? Are they older or younger?  Which sibling are they the closest with?

no siblings. at least, none by blood that they know about. once, mercy thought that maybe, maybe, they might have... but it's too late now.

mercy and kasumi are practically siblings

5. What’s their relationship with their parents like? What about other relatives?

no parents or relatives to speak of, either. their most stable part of their childhood was brief, nearly two years. they were fostered by the henry's (royann and jo ellen). unbeknownst to mercy, the henry's had an adoption appeal that was denied after mercy is sent to juvie for the second time--and never sees them again. 

anderson is eventually, basically, dad-adjacent 

7. Are they in a romantic relationship? With who? How did they meet?

thane :’)

the only thing really tali remembers about being there meeting thane was the face mercy made after he dropped out of the ceiling, because she’d never seen them react like that to a person before

some of the crew are in frustrated tears about it like oh god make out already please shepard you know you’re flirting with him right you’re just beaming at the man while in his space and staring at his mouth, get a grip, and he’s just as bad,

kasumi just starts banging her head on the counter bc when the fuck are they going to get it and also mercy show some self-control you just can’t eyefuck like that in public

it... takes a while for things to click for mercy

13. What do they do for fun?

exploring as a tourist, not as a soldier. 

produce markets, botanical gardens, natural wonders, museums, street food vendors... there’s just so much life and mercy wants to soak it all in. they like popping into secondhand stores and combing through all the little trinkets and finding things for the people they love (anderson has a curio cabinet of glass figurines that mercy’s sent him over the years on assignments. he likes to think most of them were purchased)

one of their favorite things, though, is to go through music collections--the way it feels to thumb the old physical copies in decorated sleeves and flick through the orange glow of vid files, sit in a really good chair, and just listen. recently, on sleepless nights, they’ve been going through their own library with edi--an experiment in forming opinion. they don’t go to big concerts, but they really delight in live music performances 

also hack into collection agencies and erase medical debts 

17. Where were they born?

really cant be said for certain, but they were found and raised alongside the bayous and coastlines of the mississippi river. at fourteen, they were sent to a secured juvenile facility in new orleans, which started their new life in a metropolis

25. What is their biggest flaw?

it’s not their biggest flaw, but A flaw (the only one that is readily coming to mind) is that they only use One Pistol and it drives everyone insane even though they’ve always had the right amount of bullets in the end, chill y’all 

i’ll need to think on what their Big Flaw is some more, but i dont to hold up the rest of my answers as i ponder it

33. What is their biggest fear? How would they react to having to face it?

going for another simple answer here for now. i wanna say they watched some zombie movies too young. so seeing the husks, and how that mindless, awful, not-even-allowed-to-be-dead type of continued violence can happen to them and anyone else they know? not a fan. flinging that shit as far away as possible, thank you

48. Do they have any tattoos? What are the stories behind those tattoos?

they had tattoos, before cerberus rebuilt them. 

mercy got a couple pieces for their sixteenth and seventeeth birthdays. sorry for being vague! this is something that's gonna be talked about in the next chapter i'm gonna post, and it’ll have pictures :)

lil spoiler: larger than you're thinkin

57. How do they feel about sex? Are they a virgin?

for nearly all of their life, their sexuality has been I AM BUSY 

therefore, romantic and physical liaisons... haven't happened. once, mercy asked garrus if he thought liara and kaidan were into each other because they were constantly asking them about the other, and didn’t understand why he spat up his beer. mercy’s experienced aesthetic attraction to people before, sure, plenty of times, but neither sexual desire nor romantic feelings was a formula their brain needed to compute til now, here, in their thirties.

they’re not like, weirdly naive or anything. they grew up on the streets and was in the marines--it was just something other people did.

but fuck. fuck!!! things, HA, well, they change (i have written a porn(s) lord if you were kind strike me down)

85. Do they believe in ghosts?

when you’re grown alongside the wild in old, slow places, how can you not?

[onisiondrama]

(Note: I’m not repeating stories he’s told before and just putting them in parenthesis. I have a lot more videos to go until I’m caught up so that would save me a lot of time. If he gives details I never heard from him before, I will type those.)

“I Figured Something Out” Sept 24, 2020 Speaks

- Says he likes to make videos pointing out his flaws because when he realizes he was doing something wrong, he likes to point it out and move on. You shouldn’t bottle things up. - Says when he started making these video he was angry and over time he winded down. - Begs his follower to look into the Regina / Adam thing. Says Regina pretended to be a transgender person named Adam. He says he was told this by a friend of someone he loves, by someone he loves, by a Hansen insider, and two other people who looked into it. They fabricated a person and a story. He says it’s gross. He says he doesn’t know exactly what was said because he doesn’t watch those videos. - Says he recently watched a beautiful, capable, smart women talk about cancel culture and drama. She’s a republican who doesn’t believe in the far right or left. Says most people go with the flow, but she’s an individual. He says he didn’t care there were things she said that he disagreed with because of the way she spoke. He says when he talks to people online, he has to remember you’re not that different. We all have feelings and people are less reasonable in your opinion if you don’t approach them reasonably. He says he is too harsh and mean in his videos, unlike the women. He understands you’re not supposed to sugarcoat the truth, but other people have feelings. - (People are after him because he hurt their feelings.) - Brings up Regina again. He says he doesn’t know what their problem is because he never talked to them. Says there’s sincere mental illness sprinkled around the internet and it’s proven if you put Regina and Adam side by side. He says he hasn’t watch the videos side by side, but he’s seen photos. He says he doesn’t know how this got past the filters and how people can be so negligent to the truth. He says that’s what happens when you let anyone on a show. People come on to troll or to project their issues. - He says people who watched him may have felt talked down to. He says he spoke like that because he felt like his audience turned on him before he had a chance to explain why it was all ridiculous. He felt it was unintelligent for people to assume it was the truth, but he was in a situation where he was threatened with divorce if he talked. He was stuck between being the bigger person and staying silent while he was building up frustration seeing what people were saying about him. - Says if the Regina and Adam thing is true, it’s the funniest disaster that ever occurred on social media. People were saying there’s all these victims and one of them turns out to be someone dressing up as a new person. It’s bad enough people can fake texts, but when you fake a whole person that’s another level of crazy. He says he almost feels blessed to be subjected to that level of comedy. He says it’s clinically insane for someone to do that with a straight face. He says he never even heard of Adam. - When his marriage was on the rocks because of cuddlegate, he told Billie he wanted to be alone. Billie tried to work it out with him. Says that’s evil step-mom, homewrecker stuff. [I’m pretty sure he’s talking about when he made the fake divorce video and she contacted him.] Says he had the opportunity to run away and abandon his family. He chose to stay because he doesn’t want to be that dad that choses his lustful side over his heart. He broke down crying at one point because he almost let down his family and he almost lost them. He didn’t talk to Billie for a few months after cuddlegate until Kai was like “uwu”. He says he told Kai it was a bad idea and it ended horribly. Says he’s done better than his dad and numerous other dads. - Says he doesn’t speak to people in his life as respectfully as he should. - Anyone in his shoes would be just as bitter and angry as he was. Some people wouldn’t even be alive. He lashed out because he didn’t get a fair chance. People won’t do a charity stream with him. - Once he told his full side in videos, people didn’t want to interview him anymore because he didn’t seem crazy anymore. - Says he was part of the mob against Chris Brown. He said he’s had people scream in his face and he didn’t do anything illegal to them. He called the cops on them. - (Patreon ban, he didn’t dox on purpose) - He says he wants to get rid of boob squeeze because it’s cringey to him. [thank god!]

“My Social Life- Before And After COVID” Sept 25, 2020, Speaks

- (Chris Hansen covid cure) - Says before COVID he stopped going out in public because people were taking picture of his children and posting them to the internet. An employee at Lowes and at Dairy Queen took photos of his children. He’s protective of them. A man [Hansen] showed up to his house when his kids were home. - He was thankful when COVID hit because people would stay away from him. He’s happy he has to wear a mask. He was wearing a different disguise in public before the masks. - (Kai threatened divorce if he spoke) - Says people’s emotions and mental illness cloud their memories. He conquered that when he was 17. A girl dumped him and he told her she was a monster. This was before people would seek clout so it was just between them. He says he supports her breaking up with him because they weren’t meant to be. - Seeing how crazy Seattle and society has gotten, he doesn’t want to be apart of it.  - He was socially lynched without going to court. (Mike went to court) - COVID gave him on excuse to avoid everyone and family members. He says COVID is horrible and people have died, but for him it came at an interesting time. He compares it to when a kid bullied him really hard in elementary school and died in a sledding accident. Says some dude or chick in a truck hit the kid. He says another time a guy was bullying him hard and that guy died in a motorcycle accident. He gave his helmet to his girlfriend. He died a hero. He gave up his life for someone. He was handsome and had his life ahead of him. - Says according to his mother, his father got a women killed by not giving her a helmet. He kept it for himself. His father also allegedly slept with his cousin. His dad tried to sue him and failed. Three of his family member accused his father of being a predator. - A reporter interviewed his father and his father acted like a hero.  - His mom is the one who left his dad. He says she didn’t have to fight for custody so there’s no motivation for her to lie. - (beat up his dad story) - Criminal experts will agree with him to follow the money in cases because money is the root of all evil. Like a news station that will make more money by making a monster instead of telling a true story. It is not profitable to tell both sides. - People like black and white stores, not stories where both people make mistakes. - He love isolation. He was covered in his father’s blood when he went to juvie. His white shirt was brown with dry blood. He was happy to be there because he was away from people and life was simpler. Everybody in there was flawed, which is better than being with his hypocrite god-loving father. Typical Seventh Day Adventist garbage. Greg says he was one as well. When he was 13 he prayed and told god he wanted nothing to do with him. Many amazing things happened to him after that. - Says you have a lot of drifters who came and destroyed someone consistent in you life, then they left. He was that consistent person. He was making hundreds of videos and entertaining thousands of people per video. Now he’s down to 900 to 3,000 views per video. They came, they destroyed, they left. They destroyed someone you connected with, had a real bond with. A lot of you cheered them on as they did this and then they left. Now you’re left with the same person, but he’s more broken. He believed in good people before, but now that he was dragged down into dirt, he has dirt in his eyes. He can’t see the sun or trees. He can just see dark and sadness. He still feels your spit on his face from when you millions of people beat him senseless socially. - He says he saw a legitimate news source says there was an FBI investigation about him. Says the FBI never contacted him. - Leafy recently suggested he should become an actor. He compares it to Kevin Spacey. Says it would be sad to lose a netflix show or a movie deal because of people saying things about you. He says imagine people who were going to be on that show with you stop talking to you because they don’t want to be dragged down with you. He’s glad he wasn’t that big when he fell because it would have hurt more. Now he gets to be a no one who knows who he really is when most people live in an alternate reality. - When he lost BillyTheFridge as a friend, he didn’t lose anything because Billy was a fake friend. Billy wanted to be a white knight. Joe and Anastasia were great friends and wanted to still talk to him. Billy later on realized James wasn’t as evil as he thought and invited him to lunch with them. Says he (James) backed out and decided to stop talking to all of them. He says it’s sad he lost Joe and Anastasia as friends, but he didn’t want to drag them into the drama and make their lives more miserable. Having friends was a burden and he didn’t want them to hurt. - (Regina / Adam) Dobs is barking. - He feels like this whole thing is a grand opportunity to look at things the way they are. He doesn’t trust anyone anymore and he doesn’t believe in friendships anymore. - He swears on his life he’s more honest than Sarah, Billie, and Shiloh.

[delkios]

Show for Me (DC TV)

Title from Peter Gabriel's Sledgehammer because I still can't title~ Also, ages left deliberately vague so they're young but as old as the reader feels comfortable for the situation. Title: Show for Me Fandom: DC TV Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 4630 Characters: Len, Mick Summary: Awkward first time sex. Lewis, Len had long since decided, was the absolute worse. On this particular occasion it was due to his controlling father doing his damnedest to ensure Len made no friends growing up. Which resulted in a stunted ability to socialize. Which eventually lead to his recent predicament of how to tell Mick that Len's ready to have sex with him. They'd at least managed to bungle their way- mostly by accident -into making out occasionally accompanied by grinding, so at least that ordeal was out of the way. But the times when Mick's hands would wander, would get a little too bold and creep under Len's clothes, Len would freeze. Mick, thankfully, would back off each time without pressing for an explanation. It also tended to end the making out for the day which was a disappointment for Len but, honestly, was probably smarter in the long run. It had happened so often that Mick became cautious about the placement of his hands, about not caging Len with his body or holding him too tightly and Len really could not comprehend his luck in snagging someone like that.

But now that he was finally ready for the next step, Len wasn't sure how to go about it without just blurting out, "I'd really like to touch your dick". And he really didn't want to do that. The last few times he tried to hint about it, they ended up 1) sneaking into a multiplex theater and watching every movie playing, 2) using low-grade explosives to blow every fire hydrant on Main- which served as a nice distraction for some robberies -and 3) watching Mr. Ed re-runs while getting high. Len couldn't recall how they ended up doing that. What made it all even more complicated wan't just wanting to get his hand on Mick's cock, it was that Len wanted Mick to fuck him. For the past few weeks, trying to get over his nerves, Len had been sneaking into various gay bars around Central, listening in on conversations about sexual encounters to get an idea of what to expect. And it wasn't like Len never explored his own body on the rare occasion he had the privacy and time for it- though even being completely alone in Lewis's house, Len never felt comfortable doing more than pressing the very tip of a finger into his hole. But it was enough for Len to conclude he'd be absolutely willing to give it a try. With Mick. If he could ever figure out how to say so. If nothing else, however, Len was determined. He picked a night- a weekend where Lisa would be at a sleepover and Lewis taking a week to blow all their money in New Orleans -to make it happen. Len prepared food- takeout cheesesteaks and fries with a ziplock bag of condoms and lube hidden between the larger paper bags, saturated with grease -and himself- mentally and physically and still coming up with and discarding scenarios even as he was knocking on the door to Mick's shitty apartment. Even after the food was eaten and ill-gotten beer drank, Len still hadn't come up with a plan but, given he was also pressing Mick down into the couch and kissing him senseless, Len figured plans were overrated. At least in this case. He rolled his hips down, feeling Mick's arousal against his hip, making Mick groan into his mouth and it both frightened and elated Len because this was going to happen. His hands shook from both excitement and nerves, pushing his hands up and under Mick's shirt, mapping the thick muscles with his palms. Mick made a noise like desperation right before he pulled back from Len's lips. "Wait- Len." "Hm?" He just kissed his way down Mick's jaw and neck, breathing him in deep. "Gotta... stop- wait." Fumbling, Mick grabbed at Len's wrists. He took a moment to breath before saying, voice wavering a bit, "Keep this up, I don't think I can keep my hands from wandering too far." Definitely happening. "I'm okay with that." "What?" "I am okay," Len said slowly, one hand sliding down Mick's body until he could press the heel of it just above Mick's groin, "with doing more." Mick's jaw dropped open. "You... really? You wanna... How? I mean, like- hands or- or mouth?" Len licked his lips- now or never. "Like," he forced himself to keep Mick's gaze, "you could fuck me." Mick's jaw dropped even further. "Really?" "Do you not want to?" "I want to! Hell yeah, I want to! I just didn't think- I thought it'd be- are you really sure?" "Yes, Mick." Len pushed himself up from the couch. "Though I think your bed will be a little more comfortable for this." "Yeah, okay, uh. I got some stuff. You know- condoms and lube." Len's lips twitched. Of course Mick was prepared for this. "Me, too." Feeling more confidant, Len began walking to Mick's room, pulling his shirt off as he went. When he still hadn't heard Mick move, Len half turned, hands instinctively folding his shirt between them. "Are you coming?" Mick all but fell off the couch scrambling after him. He caught up with Len just inside the bedroom door, spinning the man around to claim him in a searing kiss. Len grabbed the front of Mick's shirt and walked them back to the bed. At the last moment, Len spun them around, shoving Mick onto the mattress. He bounced once, flopping onto his elbows and looking up at Len with amazement. Len smirked at him, tossing his shirt aside and running his hands over his waist before undoing the fly to his jeans, shoving them down and off, leaving Len in just his underwear. Mick just lay there, throat bobbing as he visibly swallowed. Len huffed in laughter, leaning down just enough to tug on the cuff of Mick's jean leg. "Well?" Mick needed no further encouragement, fumbling out of his own clothes until he was naked of everything but a very tented pair of boxes. Len licked his lips and crawled onto the bed and Mick sat up to meet him halfway. Their hands ran over newly bared skin, stealing kisses from each other as they admired the other's body. Len straddled Mick's hips, grinding down teasingly and feeling Mick shudder against him. He snaked his hand down to Mick's boxer's and Mick groaned, leaning back, giving Len more access. His hand closed around Mick's shaft and Len licked his lips in anticipation, pumping once before sliding his hand up, searching for the head- Abruptly Len pulled away. Mick got as far as, "What-" before he was shoved into the mattress, Len grabbing the waistband for Mick's boxers and yanking them down to his thighs. Mick's cock sprung out, thick and curved and bobbing in the air. It looked like it was wrapped in a sock, except for the very tip where the bulbous end was peeking out. It was so alien from Len's own that he blurted out, "What's wrong with your dick?" "Whaddya mean what's wrong with it?" Mick got up on his elbows and Len could tell from the set of his shoulders he was beginning to get defensive. "Is it 'cause I'm uncut? You got a problem with that?" Len opened his mouth to ask what the hell 'uncut' meant before it hit him: Mick wasn't circumcised. It then also occurred to Len that he'd never actually seen a penis asides from his own before- all the skin mags his father had was nothing but women and Len had been so self-conscious about scars and bruises in any circumstances that required undressing that he never peeked at the other boys, even in juvie. He reached out, dragging a finger over Mick's cock, beginning to wilt, watching the skin slide with it. "This is what it's supposed to look like?" From what little he knew about circumcision, Len had thought it was just snipping off a flap of skin like a stray thread or something. He didn't think foreskin was actually a... a flesh sheath. "If it's natural, yeah." Mick's hands were fisting the sheets, still defensive but at least he wasn't shoving Len away and leaving. "Lotta guys in town got circumcised 'cause of health reasons but my dad didn't like it. Said it was- uh," his eyes flickered to Len guiltily, "he didn't like it." Given Len knew Mick's father had been a hardline Protestant, he appreciated the lack of specifics jabbing at his own (lapsed) faith. He hummed and wrapped his fingers around Mick again- now mostly flaccid. When he pulled down, it drew the foreskin back and revealed a more familiar head. He pumped again, feeling Mick's cock twitch and thicken in his fist, the foreskin pulling back further the harder he got. Mick squirmed beneath him, biting back a moan. "So," his voice cracked slightly at his forced nonchalance, "when do I get to see yours?" Len paused, suddenly feeling self-conscious again. Mick rolled his eyes. "I've seen a circumcised dick before. When I was little a bunch of us would cut school sometimes when it got hot and jumped in a pond. None of us planned ahead and brought swimsuits." "How scandalous," Len drawled, letting Mick push him back so he could sit up. "You're a natural born rule breaker, aren't you?" "Lucky for you I am." He pulled Len's cock out, grip tight and firm- and too dry for more than a couple pumps before drawing his fist up until it was just below the head. "Always liked the way they looked," Mick rumbled, sounding like he was mostly talking to himself. "Just as gorgeous as the rest of you." Len couldn't stop the flush of pleasure if he wanted to. Instead Len pumped his hand around Mick, slow and firm, and thought the movement of foreskin could be surprisingly mesmerizing. "I think natural suits you," he purred, scooting back onto Mick's lap again, hands bumping together. "A little rugged-looking on the outside, but under that," he thumbed where the vein met the flared rim of the head, pressing against it until Mick swore and shook, "everything else is mine," Len whispered against Mick's lips. Mick's mouth dropped open and, with a long, guttural moan, came all over Len's hand. Len sat back on his heels and looked down at his hand, letting Mick's softening cock slip out of it, as if unable to comprehend what happened. Mick fell back on the bed and threw an arm over his eyes. A deep flush was starting to darken Mick's cheeks, all the way down his neck. "Sorry," he mumbled. "I didn't- that wasn't supposed to happen." "Happens to all of us," Len replied neutrally. He could only assume it happened to everyone at some point, virgin that he was. He cast his eyes about, trying to find something that wasn't the bed to wipe his hand off with. Len noticed Mick was peeking up at him from under the crook of his elbow and Len decided, what the hell, and tentatively lapped at the spunk on his knuckles. It didn't taste great but it wasn't actively unpleasant, either. It did make Mick moan so Len figured he'd commit and methodically licked every trace up. After, Len sat, perched on Mick's thighs, the two awkwardly trying not to meet each other's eyes as they tried to figure out what to do next with Mick's cock still flaccid between them and Len's own flagging. "Um," Mick shifted a bit, as best he could under Len, anyway, "I'll be ready to go in about ten minutes. If you wanna wait." Len was about to ask sarcastically what Mick proposed they'd do in the mean time- watch some tv, heat up some popcorn -before remembering what the ultimate end goal was. The thought made him clench reflexively. "Okay, yeah, uh... how," he cleared his throat when his voice felt on the verge of cracking, "how do you want to do this?" "On your hands and knees would be good." "Right." Len pulled back, shucking his underwear off entirely and Mick did the same. When he got back on the bed, in the position Mick requested, Len couldn't help tensing, feeling oddly vulnerable. A large, warm hand rubbed between his shoulder blades and then down his spine but it didn't do much to slow Len's beating heart. Then both of Mick's hands kneaded at the globes of Len's ass, pulling the cheeks apart and exposing him and Len tightened his jaw to keep from calling this off. He agreed to give it a try, he couldn't end it before anything even happened. Then a thumb ran over his hole, gentle, pressing just enough to catch the rim as Mick rubbed and it felt so intimate it punched the breath right out of Len. "You good?" Mick asked in that quiet, dreamy voice he sometimes got when mesmerized by fire. That put an unexpected stab of lust in Len. He pushed his hips back, pressing against Mick's thumb. "Yeah. Do it." When Mick swore and fumbled for the bag on the floor, Len smirked to himself. He liked having that kind of power over his partner, making him clumsy and eager. He waited, listening to the click of the lube cap, the soft sound as Mick spread it over his finger and let out a deep breath when Mick said, "Here we go." Mick pressed in just slightly and Len yelped, pulling away. "What the hell?" Len had been expecting the lube but that didn't feel like Mick's thumb had a moment ago. He turned to Mick, "Are you wearing a latex glove?" Mick held his hand up, one finger glistening slightly. "Hygiene or whatever. Supposed to help stop spreading disease or something." For a moment Len just stared at him. But he got back into position with a vaguely confused, "Whatever." Len was suddenly mentally transported to an hour ago, laying in the bathtub with water in his ass, trying to get himself cleaned out. Sex was going to have to do a lot of work to be worth the mortification and uncomfortableness that came with the prep. A cold, slick finger worked its way into his hole, squirming and gradual and Len had shut his eyes, trying to convince himself not to tense up. Mick's other hand rested on the small of Len's back, thumb running circles over his hip which was nice. Then it started massaging a cheek, pulling it aside so Mick had a better view of Len's hole and it was embarrassing but also surprisingly hot, especially when Mick groaned and said things like, "You're so fucking beautiful, Len, how are you so damn gorgeous?" Normally Len didn't like people talking about him like he was a girl- calling him beautiful or pretty or anything like that -mainly because it was always meant to be derogatory. But Mick, like many things with Mick, was an exception. There was something about Mick praising him, either his looks or skills or cleverness, in that rough voice of his that made Len melt. It wasn't, however, enough for Len to forget the awkwardness of his current position and eventually he said, "Mick." "Yeah?" "We gotta do it like this?" He looked over his shoulder to see Mick staring back. "Like what?" "Like this." Len wiggled his hips slightly. "I feel like I'm on display." "For me, maybe. No one else is gonna see you like this." Mick's words were accompanied by his free hand giving a slight, possessive squeeze to Len's ass cheek. "I know I just... feel like livestock or something." Mick snorted. "Your ass is too skinny to be winning Best In Show." "Mick-" "Fine, fine." Mick pulled his finger out and Len was momentarily distracted at how empty he suddenly felt. "On your back." It took a few moments to get Len re-situated, a pillow under his hips to give Mick a better angle to work with. When Mick pressed his finger- re-lubed -back in, Len couldn't help but ask, "Not gonna tell me how gorgeous I am in this position?" "You're gorgeous no matter what, you vain shit." Mick drawled, his tone more fond than his words. He leaned forward to give Len a soft little kiss- which hadn't been Len's intention with the switch but was definitely a bonus he'd take. "Now shut up and let me fuck you." Len huffed in laughter, stealing another quick kiss. "By all means." It was definitely weird, feeling Mick's finger wriggling around inside him, pressing against the sides. It wasn't bad but not good enough for Len to consider doing this again. After a while, Mick pulled his hand out, squeezed out some more lube and this time pushed two fingers in. Now Len was starting to get uncomfortable. His cock was starting to flag from neglect and discomfort. Mick noticed and wrapped his hand around the base which had Len shuddering. Unfortunately Mick didn't do much else with it. Every now and again he'd pump his hand, but it was like an after thought and Len couldn't get more than half hard. Eventually Mick took his hand away with a frustrated sound. "Jack yourself off, would you?" Len snorted, doing as he was told. "Figures a guy that can't pat his head and rub his stomach at the same time can't multitask," he teased. That got him a glare. "If you wanna make this harder on yourself, then do whatever you want. But jacking off is suppose to make you less tense so this part would be easier." Len bit his lip to hold back a groan, hard on coming back to life under his own expert touch. It was certainly a nice distraction and that, in turn, made the fingers in his ass less uncomfortable as he relaxed. "Who told you that?" This time it was Mick who tensed, pausing briefly and staring at a spot just over Len's shoulder. Mick getting embarrassed so many times in so short a period was kind of blowing Len's mind. "I, uh... got someone to show me." "Show you what?" "How to fuck." Mick's voice gradually got quieter until he was all but mumbling. "A guy." Len got up on his elbows, so surprised by this admission he'd all but forgotten about Mick's fingers. "You got someone to teach you anal? Who?" Mick ducked his head, turning red all the way to the tips of his ears. "A hooker." "You paid a hooker to teach you anal?" "Well who else was I supposed to ask?" Mick shot back, fingers curling in instinctive reaction, making Len gasp. "Most I ever did was finger a couple girls and they're self-lubricating! I wanted to make sure I wouldn't hurt you!" For a moment, Len couldn't think of anything to say. Mick had put in more thought to this than Len expected- hell, even more than Len did because, really, his ventures eavesdropping and scrounging for information in men's health magazines wasn't nearly as informative as a hands on demonstration. As the silence stretched on into something awkward once more, Len smirked and said, "Self-lubricating?" "Shut up," Mick growled, curling his fingers again, this time to deliberately make Len gasp. After a while, the movement of Mick's fingers inside him was starting to get almost soothing. Enough to the point that Len couldn't help but rock his hips along with it. Mick kissed his upright knee. "You ready for one more?" "Go for it." The third finger was tight, almost to the point of pain but Len just pumped his dick harder to distract him from it. Maybe they were starting to get the hang of this, he thought. "How're you doing?" Len asked, tilting his head so he could see if Mick's own cock was getting hard yet. It was indeed, complete with a thick bead of precum pearling at the end and if that damn near wasn't the most delectable thing Len had ever seen. "C'mon," Len said, wriggling a bit. "Let's do this." Mick groaned. "You're gonna be the fucking end of me, Lenny." "At least I'm worth it." "Damn right you are." When Mick pulled his fingers out this time, Len felt even emptier and open. Thankfully it didn't take Mick long to put on a condom and slather lube over himself, keeping Len from starting to get self-conscious. "Ready?" Mick asked and when Len nodded, he pushed in slowly. It, like Mick's fingers before, felt odd but Len was loose enough that there was no pain or discomfort. Gradually Mick kept going until he sank all the way to the hilt and Len had to take a couple deep breathes because Mick's cock was longer than his fingers had been and Len felt... full. It was the only thing he could think of. Above him, Mick was shaking slightly, eyes shut and face screwed up like he was convincing himself to stay still. Eventually his eyes cracked open and he said, voice tight, "Tell me when you're ready to go." Len couldn't help smiling up at him. "Go for it." He pulled back, tentatively, until just the tip remained, and then pushed in just as slowly and Len breathed out with him. Gradually Mick picked up speed and Len couldn't help the little noises that came out of him when he did. As Mick hit the speed where each thrust pushed out a moan, he shifted forward, elbows on either side of Len's shoulders so Len could feel the roll of Mick's entire body against him. Mick's weight over him was almost suffocating and Len loved it with an intensity that shocked him. Just the fact he liked it at all was shocking but there Len was, tempted to grip Mick's back and press the man down against him. It was like a cocoon, warm and possessive and comforting and Len never felt safer in his life, having Mick between him and the rest of the world, cradled in those powerful arms. It was worth it. Len would do damn near anything to recreate this moment and it would be worth it. Except... the angle wasn't quite right. Len squirmed on the bed, tilting his hips forward and back, trying to figure out which was better. Mick bit down on his shoulder and groaned. "Fuck, Lenny- gonna cum if you keep doing that." Len opened his mouth to say, "Isn't that the point?" but caught himself. Instead he said, "Mick, hang on- Mick!" Mick's hips stuttered mid-thrust. He growled against Len's chest, arms braced and back bowed as if it was through sheer force of will he didn't keep pounding into Len. "What?" He rasped, pushing back to look down at Len. "Something wrong?" "Sort of." The sex was nice but not really satisfying. At least not to the extent everyone around Len seemed to consider it. That got Mick's attention, pulling back further, something like horror edging into his expression. "Am I hurting you? Is it bad? Do you need-" "No, nothing like that. I just... you're not getting in deep enough." He squirmed some more and Mick- realizing what the problem was -tried to adjust his own positioning, lifting up, leaning back, leaning forward. It wasn't until he got his arms underneath Len's legs, dick shifting, that Len gasped. "There! Holy shit- do that again!" Surprised by the response, Mick cautiously circled his hips. It was so close but maddeningly still not enough. Len kicked his heel into Mick's shoulder. "Harder!" Mick pulled out a few inches before thrusting back in- still slowly but with more force and that time Len moaned. "That's it. Fuck, Mick." Encouraged, Mick did it again and again, gradually picking up speed with each subsequent thrust. It was a bit of an odd position for him, half risen to his knees and practically holding Len's bottom half in the air, and it made his muscles burn and quiver but if it made Len keen and tremble like that, Mick would endure damn near anything. Eventually he had to rearrange Len's legs to over his arms, then, when they kept slipping, over his shoulders and Len hooked his legs as best he could, crying out, one hand clawing at the bed and the other stripping his cock in time with Mick's thrusts. Mick was so mesmerized, so focused in trying to wring out as many noises from Len as possible that he lost his balance mid-thrust, falling forward. He caught himself on his hands and Len was damn near bent in half, but he made the loudest noise Mick had ever heard from him. Half-moan, half-sob and he started begging Mick for more. Mick's brain went completely blank, just rutting into Len as hard and fast as he could, like their lives depended on it. The pressure built up in him, threatening to steal his breath away but all Mick could do was watch Len, fixating on his chest where Len's cock was dripping pre-cum. "Shit, Lenny. Baby, you're so gorgeous. Fuck- the things you do to me. Anything you want, Lenny, I'd do fucking anything for you-" his words cut off as his second orgasm hit him, legs churning as he pressed in as close to Len as possible, muffling a groan into Len's chest. An arm came around, wrapping around Mick's head and keeping him there as Len just whispered Mick's name over and over until he came, too, coating both of them with spunk. Len fell back into the bed bonelessly, may have even blackout for a moment because the next thing he knew, Mick was doing his best to clean them off with a discarded shirt. It may have been Len's. He wasn't exactly in the frame of mind to care in any case, not even about the used condom tossed carelessly on the bedside table. Len was still coming down as Mick rearranged the two of them into more comfortable positions. Mick lay out on his side, head propped up with one hand, the other laying possessively on Len's chest, thumb running lightly over the skin there. "That good?" Mick asked. He didn't sound smug, more genuinely curious. Len hummed, smiling faintly. "I wouldn't be opposed to doing that again in the near future." "Yeah?" Mick settled down, hooking his chin over Len's shoulder. His voice was a little more tentative as he asked, "Maybe next time you can fuck me?" Len blinked, then shifted to look down at his partner. "You want me to fuck you?" "Yeah. You don't wanna?" "No- I mean yes- wait." Len forced himself to pause and start over. "I didn't think you'd want me to. I mean, I didn't think you'd want to be the girl in this relationship." Len suddenly was washed in dread as he suddenly realized the implications of his own actions. Mick just reached up a hand to poke Len in the forehead, pressing until Len put his head back down on the bed. "That's dumb, what does that even mean? Being the girl in the relationship. Unless you're not telling me something important, you're no more a girl than I am." "So... this isn't going to change anything?" "Nothing changed when we started making out, right? Don't see why sex would." Mick shifted closer. "I just thought you'd wanna use your dick sometime, too. And the way you were moaning and writhing- fuck, Len. Pretty sure you ruined me for sex with anyone else." Len smiled and turned so his could throw an arm over Mick's shoulders. "Yeah, partner. Whatever you want."